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| The Perpetual TomorrowGive me that pound of flesh
A broken hand with bloody knuckles
A twisted mind and wicked chuckles
suckin in that baby's breath
while I fuck the world around me
tear my dreams right at the seams
as my mind steams hear my cold screams
at this bloody mediocrity.
Whisper in my ear that I'm not here
that I am someplace gold, that I'm still in the fold,
where it never gets cold, where I can grow old
and watch as i shed a single tear.
I'll make a retina incision
and tear your eyes from your vision
show you my mission
all with the utmost precision
in fact, I propose a toast
to my internal inflation
I'll give you a glimpse of the trepidation
Now please view this prose:
I have a vision of a purpose, that one can walk outside and walk anyplace, greet anyone, go anywhere and do anything. There is no need to hate, lie, cheat, or steal because everyone has everything that they want. There is plenty of food, there is good entertainment. Minstrels are playing music in the streets as children play ball and dogs run freely. Everyone works, but it doesn't take much to thrive because everyone works together. There is no nation, there is no military, there is no need for protection from other humans, but our town does have powerful warrior champions who took up that position after years of battle training done of their own volition. Everyone gets along for the most part, there is no need for a justice system because no one believes that they are good enough to judge anyone else.
But then, I walk outside. A middle aged man looks the other way as we pass on the sidewalk. I walk into sheetz and the 15 customers in it are not saying a word to one another. The town stinks, literally. It smells of burnt oil, trash, and gasoline. I go back inside, and sit on the computer for another 6 hours until i have to go stand under the flourescent lights and push buttons on a touch screen for 8 hours to make money so that I can buy prepacked dry frozen food packets and afford the insane cost of fueling my car and keeping my also very expensive rented house somewhat warm. I don't HAVE to do this, but in order for me to even somewhat fit into society and not get mocked in every conversation I have with everyone, I, as a 24 year old single male, should have my own place, a "good job", and a car. All of which I have. It really isn't all it's cracked up to be, is what I'm saying. Fuck this prepackaged dry frozen lifestyle, fuck playing on the computer for fun, fuck my good job, fuck thinking about going to college, fuck not saying hi to people, fuck getting girlfriend for the sake of having one. But I'll still do it, I'll still do it all again tomorrow. Nothing is scarier to me than that:
I've said it all before with even more sorrow
That if we had another way to be
then we just may break free
of this perpetual tomorrow.
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| Bzzrrttt ddurrrr blurr PING PING PING... Mental Connection Activated: Commence Imagination
From the doped out network of envisionary domination, the sounds of the warrior smashing on the giga drums of the entrancing abyss ring out across the dystopian entropy of the neural caverns we've so affectionately deemed five ones. Everything moves to the rhythm of the drums, from the killer jester warriors breathing fire on government officials while freeing the minds of police officers by separating their heads from their shoulders through flashy backflips they had to spend years learning to do.. while on stilts to the couple who is forever new and in love, never losing the amazed look in their eyes as they dance through space, fuel the twirling of the stars and have us all stare up in wonder at what might have been, what shall be, and give the ultimate grace of good luck on those that never ask why. In all this magic and splendor, there is a dark and dank corner of pure order, where imagination meets reality in anything but a graceful connection. Where things are how they are, where people act how they act. Where there is no magic, no entropy, no battle, no honor, no wisdom, and most of all, no hope. There is a no way to facilitate the disconnect from this horrid little span of reality, for this is the sector that is to be seen with the eyes, heard with the ears, felt with the skin, tasted, and smelled. You eat it up. You crap it out. This is physical existence, and it has been rotting away into pure fucking shit. That is all it is, all it will ever be. Fuck you and your reality, Fuck this world, Fuck every minute that I realize that I am actually here. I hope this leaves a rotten taste in your mouth, cause this world leaves a rotten pit in my mind. Sunshine and happiness to all you dope mofo's that actually read this, may you ride to splendor and ever affectionate bliss on the wings of a chaotic anarchy that we all have a hand in making, as we leave this world a less boring place for future generations. That's Dope.
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| Guest poetry from Crazy Jenno good-night kiss, just winking stars
floating to sleep, hung half-way between
the moon and the shrinking earth
suspended, without a mattress or a pea
for a princess.
one hundred and fifty years to dream
a Sleeping Beauty sleep, the injection
my spinning wheel spindle
weaving spells of slow motion
into the future.
climbing higher into space, sinking
deeper into sleep, tucked inside
our spaceship, silently waiting
one and twenty spacebirds, sleeping
in a frozen pie.
reaching further than a lifetime
flying beyond old nursery rhymes
a falling star singing lullabies
I wonder if a prince might wake me
with a kiss.no good-night kiss, just winking stars
floating to sleep, hung half-way between
the moon and the shrinking earth
suspended, without a mattress or a pea
for a princess.
one hundred and fifty years to dream
a Sleeping Beauty sleep, the injection
my spinning wheel spindle
weaving spells of slow motion
into the future.
climbing higher into space, sinking
deeper into sleep, tucked inside
our spaceship, silently waiting
one and twenty spacebirds, sleeping
in a frozen pie.
reaching further than a lifetime
flying beyond old nursery rhymes
a falling star singing lullabies
I wonder if a prince might wake me
with a kiss.
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| I muse in these oppressive days in a daze
for I yearn to learn the atrocious ways you laze
and tend to trend. Too cool of a fool to be trite,
you play the same game every night.
Ya spit the same shit, pop the same pills,
killin more brain cells as you explore the same hells.
I'd venture to say, that you've strayed from your way.
Free your mind, punk. You ain't trippin, you're drunk.
Or just do it again, again, and again. Keep on sippin that syrup
til it's your last friend.
I dare you to say that I'm wrong, that there's no truth in this song,
cause you know that ya trapped in a flow that'll throw
your soul out into the cold, mold your brain into a strained and stretched
far fetched sequel; a meek and weak version of what you once were.
I wish I could do more, but this is your score to settle my friend.
Test your mettle, mind your body and free your mind.
The curtain will rise and for certain you'll find that true beauty awaits you behind.
Otherwise, you'll just die blind in a gutter somewhere, and no one will care.
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| Lavender and lilacWatched the Animatrix for a random exponent of two last night. As I watch I can't help but realize how much better mankind's future will be if we rely less on machines and more on cows. Cows are to man as man is to machines. Also, today lived up to it's title of the most depressing day of the year. It pretty much started at midnight last night, and hopefully will end at midnight tonight. XXXX is proving to be very interesting and tight lately, and I'm happy that I became hands on involved once again, after months of retheorizing after my loss before. I'm also developing quite an affinity for cryptograms. My mind is on fire moreso than it's ever been. I'm emotionally swell as well... I'm strangely at peace. There's so much evil and corruption in the world, but after years of careful deliberation, I feel the need to crush it with an iron fist fading. Instead I feel a strong desire to create an island of my friends and family, keeping us pure and simple. Hopefully one day I'll be able to shut us off from the world all together, and we can live life together in harmony. That, to me, would be heaven on earth. It's a renassaince for Dheric, to learn and do as much as possible every day to push that goal forward. If all of us could see this as truth, and everyone work toward this together, it would be all the more feasable. There would be so many broken links in that chain, however, that the action of banding may cause more dissention than comradery. I have no false idealism about the people around me, contrary to what some people seem to think. I can see people's faults just as clearly as their virtues, unfortunately those that could help the most would stand a good chance to fall victim to greed. It will just take me so long to get anywhere tangible in this task that by the time you can see that it's happening, you will more than likely have forgotten about this entry. My hope is that if anyone was to read this, they would think "I'd like to be a part of that.. what could I do to help?" But regardless of this, I'd like to think this is not a post for anyone to comment to reassure me that it's a beautiful thing I'm trying to do, I don't need an self assurance or additional confidence, I'm not trying to feed my ego. I'm merely casting a glimpse into what I'm thinking about, in and out, every day, and have been for quite some time. This has been a picture in my mind, the fog slowly clearing, to where I now have a realistic view of what is encompassed by this dream.
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